Time for Love

Awesome contradiction

Water running through the creeks
“splish” splashing at my feet
Like a god of ancient Greeks
My soul soars with each heart beat

As I float and float in space
Circle around the universe
Halt when I find you face to face
And melt in your divine embrace

I perceive your virgin eyes
Twinkling through your feathery hair
Too shy to keep up with my stare
In ecstasy I rise and rise

Yet I know you’re far away
I reach for you and you’re not there
“Dust in the wind” is my affair
Waiting game I play each day

Longing for you is an addiction
Kind “a” sweet, kind “a” bitter
Do I enjoy this, or do I suffer
What an awesome contradiction

Public Victory / the 7HHEP

Paradigms of interdependence

“There can be no friendship without confidence
and no confidence without integrity”
Samuel Johnson

Up to this point we have gone over three habits that dealt with Private Victory, things that we should master on ourselves to be completely independent. Now it’s time to reach for interdependence which will be covered in the next three habits starting from next post, as for now, it is essential to have an introduction to Public Victory as the milestone for interdependence; effective interdependence can only be built on independence. Private Victory precedes Public Victory, self mastery and self discipline are the foundation of good relationships with others. You have to like yourself to like others, and you can only do that by knowing yourself and mastering yourself. It is not what we say or what we do that affects our relationships, it’s what we are. Interdependence opens up worlds of possibilities for deep, rich, meaningful association.

The emotional bank account:
An emotional bank account is a metaphor that describes the amount of trust that’s been built up in a relationship, depositing through courtesy, kindness, honesty, keeping your commitments and building up a reserve.
When trust accounts are high, communication is easy, intense and effective. Building and repairing relationships takes time, it takes character to be proactive, to focus on your circle of influence.
Building and repairing relationships are long-term investments.

Six Major Deposits:

1-What is important to another person must be as important to you as the other person is to you. The golden rule is to do onto others as you would have others do onto you.

2-In relationships the little things are the big things. People are very tender, very sensitive inside. Age or experience makes no difference.

3-People tend to build hopes around promises, if for some reason you couldn’t keep the promise, explain the situation thoroughly to the person involved and ask to be released from the promise. If you cultivate the habit of always keeping the promises you make, you build bridges of trust that span the gaps of understanding between you and others.

4-Unclear expectations of rules and goals undermine communication and trust. We create many negative situations by simply assuming that our expectations are self-evident and that they are understood and shared by others.

5-Integrity is conforming reality to our words; keeping promises and fulfilling expectations. One of the most important ways to manifest integrity is by being loyal to the ones that are not present, as well as, avoiding any communication that is deceptive, full of guilt, or beneath the dignity of others.

6-It takes great deal of character to apologize quickly out of ones heart rather than out of pity. People with little internal security can’t do it. In addition, they usually feel justified in what they did. “if you’re going to bow, bow low” says Eastern wisdom.

Leo Roskin taught: “it is the weak who are cruel, gentleness can only be expected from the strong”The laws of love and the laws of life:

This post is a continuation of the last post of 7HHEP.Your questions, enquiries as well as participation are highly appreciated 🙂 )

Habit Three; Put First things first / the 7HHEP (cont.)

Becoming a Quadrant II self-Manager; a method of practice presented by the author:

1-Identifying roles: write down you key roles, whatever comes immediately to your mind.
Here are two examples:

2-Selecting goals: select one or two results you want to accomplish in each role during a week period. Provided that they are tied to the longer-term goal you identified in conjunction with your personal mission statement.

3- Scheduling: spread those activities (goals) on a week timetable according to your preference, but remember to put first thing first and delegate other activities as much as you see fit.

4- Daily Adapting: when your prioritization is done on weekly bases and connected to your higher goals, your daily activities is readily adapted and can be modified each day according to your daily chores.

5- Living it: as you go through your week, there will be times when you find yourself obliged to attend to activities that are urgent but not important, or pleasure escaping as in Quadrant IV. Your principle center, your self-awareness and your conscience can provide you with a sense of security, guidance and wisdom to empower you to use your independent will and stay as much as possible in Quadrant II.

6- Delegating: there are two types of delegation:

Gofer Delegation: which means “go for this, go for that, do this, do that and tell me when it’s done”. This type of delegation gets the job done, but it is not a full delegation that gets others to accomplish full results, you’d find yourself on your toes with each delegated activity.

Stewardship Delegation: this type of delegation is focused on results instead of methods. You should be clear in presenting your desired results, and should give guidelines, but the method should be left to others to choose. You should also set up standards of performance that will be used to evaluate results, as well as specify times when evaluation will take place. Also the results of the evaluation should be clear, i.e. what will happen; good or bad, reward and punishment.
This type of delegation although takes longer in the beginning, it is far more beneficial in the long run and is a full delegation process.

PS; This post is a continuation of the last post of 7HHEP.Your questions, enquiries as well as participation are highly appreciated 🙂 )

A Word of Appreciation

A lot of times people wonder why I stay home most of the time, my friends seem to be worried that I might loose all my social connections and end up alone. What they don’t understand, and never could since they have never tried blogging, that I have been more social behind a screen. The ones I meet are genuine people who share my thoughts, my good times and bad on a daily basis. I get more insight, true stories than anywhere else, I sympathize with others and others sympathize with me. Some even went one step further in defending me like my own family Click Here . Bless their hearts. We have created this inner bond that, in some cases, is much stronger than our relations to a lot of people we know in our lives. We tend to willingly, not out of courtesy, visit our buddies, , sometimes just to say a simple hello or leave a word of appreciation. And then leave the net with an inner satisfaction and a pure sense of belonging. Some may not have their own blogs but we still know them through their commentaries and nice appreciative e-mails; an act which keeps us eager to go back now and again and get addicted to the net.
It does not matter if we know each other physically; we know each other spiritually, which is far more satisfying.

What do you say? Go get a life?
I never felt more alive than today.

A Blue Note to You

An anonymous (who is not so anonymous) sent me a poem written by Tracey Newson to show his appreciation to how my writings have affected him. He dedicated this song to me and he wanted me to publish it as a post so that all can see it. Now that was so sweet, does anyone now blame me for being so addicted?

Well, it’s a good addiction. How many of us did not change perspectives on life since we started blogging?
And what should my reply be to all of you including this anonymous? A mere thank you? I think you deserve more than that.

You Walked Lightly by Tracey Newson

You walked lightly into my life
Captivating and lovely to my mind
At first, I never cared who you were
Now I don’t know who I am without you

You kissed me
I felt my world change
You held me
I heard my heart awaken
You loved me
And my soul was born anew
You walked lightly into my life

Now my heart knows who you are
And with every breath
And every step
I take down lonely roads
Your hand is my staff
Your voice is my guide
Your strength my shelter
You’re passion my awakening
You walked lightly into my life

And all my pain
You took as your own
And all my fears
You cast into the sea
All my doubt
Lost in your eyes
You walked lightly into my life
And no matter if you choose to stay or go,
My life is forever changed
Just because you loved me
For a moment in time

And because I choose
To love you
For the rest of mine.

Dear anonymous:
A very nice and deep poem, I loved it. And I know you meant it all, and it flatters me to feel that I did have an affect on you, but what you did not know is that you and all the wonderful others did have an enormous effect on me. I just wish that I won’t disappoint you one day 🙂
Bless your heart

A Touch of Mercy

August 1990
Ibtihal was 28 years old, she had just finished her PHD from England and was preparing her official papers to apply for a job in her country Kuwait. Her mother and most of the family members were strictly religious. If it wasn’t for her deceased father’s liberated mind, Ibtihal would have never had the chance to resume her education. Her dreams were high, she anticipated reaching the moon and not any position satisfied her. She had an attitude problem, she was arrogant and she did not desperately need to earn her living. Her family was well off, and she sought a job that would give a purpose to her life.
And since all the other family members were enjoying their summer vacation outside the country, to her shock, Ibtihal found herself alone amidst the Iraqi occupation of Kuwait with a sick mother and a younger brother. With scattered dreams and no security, Ibtihal cursed her fate and withdrew to the privacy of her room, refusing to participate in any activities around the house. She was bold, obnoxious and rude with everyone around.
One day her mother persuaded her to go with a bunch of other ladies to the orphanage and help in finding homes for the orphans that were left without official authorities of which most have fled the country because of the harsh conditions. Ibtihal reluctantly went just to stop her mother’s whining.
All the kids in the orphanage were secured and distributed to different Kuwaiti homes, except for Waleed. Waleed was two months old, and everyone detested the responsibility this act would entail in case no milk was to be ensured as the occupation prolonged.
And while the other women were busy finding a home for Waleed, the little angle smiled to Ibtihal, and she hesitantly approached him and touched his delicate hand, his smile widened, she cautiously carried him, his eyes were telling her one thing; take me home, I’m yours.
And without a second thought or even consulting anyone, she carried Waleed home.
March 1991
The authorities were here to take waleed back to the orphanage, he was then nine months old and he called Ibtihal mama. Ibtihal was free to pursue her career, to look up to her prosperous future and to seek the purpose of her life. And although she had formed a bond with Waleed and he had exposed a side of her that she never knew existed, but she had to let go. There was a lot to be done, and she was not sure how to begin.
But Waleed would not let go, he was sticking to her legs like glue, and his teary eyes were pleading; please mama don’t let them take me. The thought of Waleed going back to the orphanage disturbed her and without further thinking, she started at them “let go of him”.
All the other family members got into rage, how could she do that? How about her future? And now that her mom had passed away and her brothers were loaded with their own responsibilities, who would adapt the orphan. She couldn’t do that, she was a single woman with no job. And even if she did manage to adapt him, who would marry her? Who would accept a package deal?
Inattentive to her family pleadings and to the brutal system that kept her fighting for months; Ibtihal adapted Waleed. She got married ten years later and her husband accepted her son as his own, but unfortunately he passed away after two years of marriage, leaving her alone with Waleed.
Waleed enjoyed the best upbringing, in an environment of pure love and was provided with the best education anyone can hope for in Kuwait.
Waleed is now a very handsome, lively young man. And every time Ibtihal looks into his beautiful eyes she knows she had found the propose of her life.

Many times we go an extra mile to find a purpose for our lives, when in reality it’s right at the palms of our hands, we just have to open our eyes to see it.

Bo-Rakan Was Here Yesterday

He was here yesterday, and I met him. A person whom I’ve known and admired a long time back, like a comet hit me with his kind, gentle and elegant words. He said he knew me, WHO ME? Who am I against this giant myth?
And he said he enjoyed my blog and my poems Click Here

YES I WANT TO BRAAAAAAAAG;
ALBDELLATIF ALDE3AIJ, THE ONE AND ONLY READS MY BLOG

………
I was speechless, or shall I say converse -less?

When I first started my blog I wanted to know how others felt about what I wrote, waiting eagerly for each comment, and was disappointed many times for not having any. At times I thought I’d quit, but the few dedicated visitors (bless their hearts) kept me going. It never crossed my mind that someone like Bo-Rakan would actually visit, let alone enjoy my writings.
Ahlan wasahlan bik ya rea7at eljanah

I was greeted here today
By a star far away
Who shook my senses,
quivered my defenses
And surly made my day

Thanks Bo-Rakan for making my day, and I pray that you’d soon luxuriously (never out of necessity) join our humble world.
And thank you Sa7at Al-Safat for making this possible

Posted by Hello
Star Wheels by:Aya

Still More Memories

Memories of days gone by
Still vivid in my mind
Time added change to places
Yet pictures stayed behind;
Nostalgic, monumental and kind
To tell the story of my life
When youth once filled them with flames
And now they’re just pictures in frames


Saint Michael’s College, Burlington, Vermont, USA


College of the Siskiyous, Weed, California, USA



Golden Gate at sunset from the Berkeley Hills. Berkeley, Cal, USA


.
UC Berkeley, California, USA

Happy Mother’s Day……….

Previous Older Entries