What About Falling in Love

Thought of the day:
To live and to suffer -heaven, hell- that is what I want to feel” Julie de lespinasse

Why do we need it? Why can’t we do without it?
When we are young it is so easy to fall in love, we don’t know it, but it just happens. We’re not inclined to define it or explain it, it just develops spontaneously.
But as we grow older and certainly wiser, we become reluctant at any sign that might indicate it. Why is that? Experience?
Some of us may have never had that experience, but still too timid to try it.
Love entails a bundle of mischief that is ironically pleasurable at the same time. It transforms humans into gods; physical appearances change, attitudes change, the very look in the eyes change. And at the same time it incites desolation; false anticipation, wearisome patience, restless sleep, self consciousness and all the other contradicting emotions that make us grow ages in a single day.
When we are older and used to a certain life style it is hard for us to change that style. We are satisfied with our stability. And the older we get the more hesitant we become to change. Are we terrified of the obligations it demands? Can we bear thinking two instead of one? Do we have the patience to play the guessing game? Absolutely not, although we yearn at times for a gentle touch, a heartfelt hello, a thunderous heart beat, a pleasure in a long anticipated kiss, as well as all the other contradicting emotions.
Why is that? And why do we never seize looking for it, yet too bashful to endure it when it finally comes our way?

Posted by Hello
“The Kiss” inspired by Klimt

11 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. minime
    Feb 18, 2005 @ 07:32:00

    G. morning Sunshine 🙂

    Ma adree, but i think the older we get the more fussy? we become.
    and very rightly said Rubes, obligation is worrisome.
    As you are less experienced when younger, almost anything is new but as your experience develops & things lose that “glitter”, then you search for the real mccoy. & this is not easy to find. In fact even then, it takes some trimming & touching up.
    But why do we need it, is because if done properly it REALLY gets the better of all.
    el7een yoam khalla9 val day 9ertay bashful? Allah yastir. 😛


  2. Jewaira
    Feb 18, 2005 @ 12:37:00

    Because we know that relationships take alot of work once the novelty wears off.
    We know that how it hurts to be betrayed, when we finally decide to trust unconditionally.
    Being in love is intoxicating, makes us breathless, and leaves us without control. And it shocks us because we think that when we are older, we can control our reactions & our emotions. Being in love is at once desirable and fearful, because you must lose yourself to fully enjoy the feelings.


  3. DJ
    Feb 18, 2005 @ 12:57:00

    I like to think that as we get older we come to realize our own self-worth, and that we deserve (and should command) more than just a “high” from love.


  4. Aquamarine
    Feb 18, 2005 @ 14:50:00

    i like this post, but i have no comment about it. 😦


  5. AyyA
    Feb 19, 2005 @ 00:07:00

    Mellow, relaxing and happy evening sweets
    I don’t think that love ever loses its glitter, and we never outgrow it. But somehow we fear it.
    Wi ba3dain ana 7asalt el bouquet mali, ma ye7ig li atdalal ishwaya? 🙂

    I guess you hit the cord Jewara, it’s the unconditional trust that some of us fear. But how about the ones that never tried it before? What are they waiting for?

    Which means that our standards (of what we expect) are higher now? I guess that makes sense.

    Sweetie that was a very cute gesture of you, I didn’t expect you to know much about the subject, you’re still in the care free age, welcome dear, and glad you liked the post 🙂

    Guys thanks a million for chipping in, I was hoping for a sound psychological analysis to this reaction, it still puzzles me.


  6. Hope
    Feb 19, 2005 @ 07:19:00

    Hi 🙂

    People always seem to question what love is really all about. I dont think it can be defined really like many other things; feelings of love, hate, anger etc. Love comes in levels and each person has a different perception of it. I think there are many people out there who have so much experience, but that does not mean they know what it is. It’s complicated!!


  7. Beatnik
    Feb 19, 2005 @ 09:20:00

    From experience i actuall fond out it is not hard to fall inlove as you made it seem. what Ive found is that it is easier to let go as we grow older that is it concerining falling in and out of love.
    as for loving the quality of it that is what changes or should otherwise one has learned nothing. I myself believed I was inlove which might have been true as a raw feeling, but in reality I was destroying my lover. I didn’t in any of my actions love him in anyway. Now I am different i do love, I realized I love persons more by simply letting them be and transcending all the feelings that involve self love more than love itself, like for example jelousy. and simply bieng there with the relization of what it is rquired to give, even if it is only a part of me and not my whole it is still love in it’s purest form.
    Does it last? i doesn’t matter, when one is concerened with tahat issue it sucks the life out of the experience and in any ways that way of thinking projects itself on the other and good god hat a negative trip it turns into.
    I say just let it be and it wouldn’t be so complicated.


  8. Hope
    Feb 19, 2005 @ 12:34:00

    Hi again,

    But maybe this is what true love is.. a love that destroys itself because it drives the person to love insanely. Maybe because it is true love, it is not meant to last.


  9. Beatnik
    Feb 19, 2005 @ 14:11:00

    there is no such thing as true love, otherwise the times you have thought you loved would be self delusional ones no? there might be a healthy love or unhelthy one. might be childish love as apposed mature. there could be mental love, many mnay kinds. so it seems to be important to simply be aware of ones cababilities to feel and rationalize that feeling inorder to fully live it out. as for the insanity involved in some kinds of love that is only one kind of that love and it is simply self love it does not involve the loving of another person at all, actually you would not believe how far off a person becomes from thier partner when insanity touches that love.
    there is a time when we love insanly yes but it should only be this once, and if one does not learn from it and GET OVER IT that person simply becomes an emoitionally immature one, who will never be able to maintain nor recognize a good and healthy relationship when it does come his or her way. Immature because as jewira said this person will not make the effort simply because the fun intails a little pain along with it.


  10. Beatnik
    Feb 19, 2005 @ 18:13:00

    sorry Rabab honey it’s the server playing tricks on me along with the computer a whole cyber mix up, sorry again about the deletions.


  11. AyyA
    Feb 20, 2005 @ 14:41:00

    Hope and Beatnik
    Thanks for sharing sweethearts; I have had problems with opening up this comment section as well, no problems with other bloggers, just mine, and I hope this one would finally get through. I’m also finding a problem with my next blog comment link, it is frustrating.


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