Skilful, Positive Thinking

On Monday, November 8, on my post “Your body is your pharmacy, and you are the doctor (continuation)”, one of my blogging buddies (Peach) have requesting more information about positive thinking, and I promised that I would dedicate a post to that, and here is goes:

The process of POSITIVE THINKING is very complex indeed. Although most of us can IMAGINE what does that mean, we hardly PRACTICE IT on a daily basis, and some might even THINK it’s a very negative, submissive way of LOOKING at things.

We are conditioned through our personal experiences TO LOOK negatively at things. For example: if a dear one was supposed to meet me at a certain time and did not show up, and there was no chance of me getting hold of him/her, I would naturally WORRY. Notice that I said naturally. And although by logic it is not natural to WORRY in this case because there are different PROBABILITIES of his/her delay, and WORRY is a combination of THOUGHTS that are only associated with negative FEELINGS, but most of us DO THAT and we call it natural because It is linked with FEELINGS that we THINK we don’t have any control over.

Notice that I have capitalized some of the words that are associated with thinking process in the last two paragraphs, and no that was not a mistake, I meant to do that to emphasize one thing; how does a human being conducts his life is nothing but a thought.

To clear this argument I will give you an example of the Bon way of thought development, Bon is a religion that was practiced in the Tibet long before Buddhism, only to show you man’s struggle through history to change his thought process and also to clarify how much our thinking process affects the way we choose to lead our lives:

In the ground, the monks would dig a small hole enough for one person standing up. In that hole a person is lowered and the top of the hole is then completely covered. This person would stay in this kinda grave for almost a week, and some minimal water and nourishment is passed to him once a day. They call this process a rebirth, and they claim that the person who goes through this process would change completely; he will be able to recognize his own energies as well as the energies emitted through matter. He would possess the ability to read other people’s minds as if he is listening to the words uttered by them. And can predict weather changes and disasters. He can also miraculously heal physical as well as emotional ailments through using these newly possessed energies.

How could this be done? Let’s think about it for a while as if me or you are the person in that hole.

First thing that would strike me is fear; fear of the darkness, fear of the creatures that might crawl over my body, fear of other metaphysical circumstances that I might encounter, and last the fear that I might not survive. All negative thinking.

Negative thinking is so powerfully destructive that they could actually kill the person.

But survival is a propensity in humans; therefore my thinking process has to change in order for me to survive.

Let’s examine how my thinking process could change:

First; I would have to get physically accustomed to the darkness and consider it a part of my natural state at the time being. Second; I would have to believe that now I am a part of this earth and all the creatures within it, and if I did not harm them and accepted their curious welcome, they would accept me in return and would not harm me. Third; if I did encounter any metaphysical circumstances, this is the chance for me to spread my knowledge above the norm and get accustomed to it. Fourth; I am a survival by nature, therefore I will definitely survive. Finally; the goal, the point of the rebirth in my thoughts is anticipation, yes, I am doing all this for a broader knowledge of my self, my energies, and how I could use them for the benefit of humanity. All positive thinking indeed.

In one of his posts; Marumba” has defied DESCARTES’s aphorism “I THINK, THEREFORE, I AM” and he restated it as “I FEEL, THEREFORE, I AM..!”, and I do tend to agree with him and add to that ” I FEEL WHEN I RELATE,THEN I THINK, THERFORE I AM”. It’s the feeling that has to be restored so that the thoughts can change. Positive feelings are the natural traits of the soul; purity, love, honesty, patience, wisdom, abundance, mercy.

But you might argue that we are human and we can’t control our feelings. True; but what are the feelings that we could not control, if we have allowed ourselves through negative thinking to adopt those feelings in the first place. Thinking process here is vital to restore my positive feelings and deal with the circumstances positively, just like the person in the hole.

How can we change out thinking process?

This process is very hard considering it deals with CHANGE. Change is not easily done, it takes time, insistence, well power, and lots of practice, but it is worth it.

First; you have to let go of all negative thoughts you were conditioned to adopt.

Second; scratch out all the negative words in your vocabulary.

Third; in your vocabulary, try to minimize the use of two negative words that gives a positive meaning like; not sad, not tiered, not raining, not bad. Instead use the definite words like; happy, relaxed or active, sunny and bright, well.

Fourth and most importantly; learn from the turtle. Yes, the turtle. In Chinese wisdom the turtle is a creature which can separate itself from its shell and look at it from outside (a different perspective), take the load off of your shoulder and look at the problem from other perspectives, in a sense of how could you be a help instead of being a burden.

Fifth; take your time to notice little things in life and appreciate them as if you will die tomorrow and will not be able to enjoy them anymore. After all you never know how long you will live anyway.

And finally; I have chosen for you some wise notes from khalil Gibran’s book ” life’s wisdom” I hope you can treasure and recite them every time you are in doubt:

1- Your daily life is your temple and your religion. whenever you enter into it, take with you your all.

2- Love is the divine knowledge that enables men to see as much as the gods.

3- Life is not only merriment; life is desire and determination.

4- Man struggles to find life outside himself, unaware that the life he is seeking is within him.

5- Know your own true worth and you shall never perish.

6- I look up high to see only light, and never look down to see my shadow. This is the wisdom which a man must learn.

7- Thoughts have a higher dwelling place than the visible world.

8- Children dwelling in the doors of tomorrow, a place where they can never be, not even in their wildest dreams.

Enjoy life; it is worth it, for every thing is nothing but a thought.

Posted by Hello

This is another photo of Lebanon taken from my friend’s balcony in Almansuriya, as requested by my blogging friend Shurouq in the last post


22 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. DJ
    Nov 24, 2004 @ 09:58:00

    I’m a believer. Positive thinking may not make our problems go away but it most certainly can make them more manageable. I discovered the power of positive thinking (on a less sophisticated level) when I was 20+ years-old and it has made all the difference. Now I know, the best cure for a frown is a smile, the best cure for the blues is a laugh, the best cure for heartache is love, etc…

    “Your happiness is directly linked to your outlook on life”

    Being reminded of it this morning has been a great start to my day. 🙂


  2. The Don ®
    Nov 24, 2004 @ 11:22:00

    I’m not sure but I think it’s called AlMansura ?? Almansuriya is here next to tha7ia sweetie, and I don’t think in Almansuriya you’ll have such a view, only view of nadi al3arabi :PP


  3. AyyA
    Nov 24, 2004 @ 12:28:00

    Glad to have made a good start to your day. You know what? During my work as CID and a Roads Planning Manager I faced a lot of personnel problems within my employees. The problems mostly stemmed from greed, jealousy, undirected ambitions. And since this attitude was very dangerous to team work, I started giving my employees a 10 day course, two hours/day on
    The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Steven R. Covey
    This course really did affect there personalities and the results were amazing.
    I still have the narrated notes on that course and may be it’s a good idea to have some of my posts dedicated to that. Well this is not what I was planning to say in my comment, actually you reminded me of another thing I used to do during that time. I used to post “a thought of the day” every morning on a board in the entrance of the department, for employees to read and adapt throughout their day. And I think I will start doing that on my coming posts.

    Ok Don
    I learned that Al-Mansoura is in Egypt, and Lebanon had Al-Mansouriya long before Q8 did. So my information about the name was broadened since I stayed there for a week, la telakhbu6ni 😉
    And yes this view is from my friends flat in Al-MANSOURIYA. I also discovered that my brother’s flat is one level down and he had it since 11 years back, which shows you how close my family is 😛


  4. Purgatory
    Nov 24, 2004 @ 19:31:00

    too long a post to read, sorry.


  5. Shurouq
    Nov 24, 2004 @ 19:55:00

    Thanks 🙂


  6. AyyA
    Nov 24, 2004 @ 21:55:00

    The subject is complicated Purg, could not make the post shorter than this, sorry
    Sure, anytime 🙂


  7. marumba
    Nov 25, 2004 @ 13:54:00

    hi ruby…
    there u go again girl…:)
    …fascinating… inspiring… as ever…:)
    if i might add..?! ATTITUDE…:)all positive wellness simply stems from our self engaged attitudes… so put on ur best dressed attitude every morning n let its positivity shine ur whole day thru regardless of all external negativities…:)


  8. AyyA
    Nov 25, 2004 @ 14:58:00

    Well said Marumba 🙂


  9. Peach
    Nov 25, 2004 @ 17:23:00

    This is really nice 🙂 and useful too. It is indeed a very difficult process. But I think change isn’t really doing something different .. it’s going bk to what’s truly inside when u’ve strayed too far .. that’s why change is good.
    Thanks for the information. Can u tell me how to implement the turtle way in my meditation though! I’ve been trying since forever .. but for some reason I can’t seem to get in right.


  10. AyyA
    Nov 25, 2004 @ 18:29:00

    Dear Peach
    Turtle example here was illustrated to give you some insight and imagination of change of attitude during crises. Let me share with you a personal story;
    About two years back I was in a conference in Japan and my parents were in Thailand for a vacation. I was supposed to meet my parents after my conference and take my mom with me to visit other parts of the Far East. It was then when we discovered that my mom was suffering from breast cancer (late stage), and she needed immediate surgery. And since my mother was diabetic and the rate of sugar in her blood was very high, surgery became very critical. My brother and his wife as well as my younger sister flew to Thailand as soon as they heard the news, and were surrounding my mom with grave faces, swollen eyes that scared the hell out of my mother. The doctor’s news was not good and it was getting worse as the time passed. I used to meditate all the time (not in front of her though) and kept repeating to myself that she will make it, she will survive, this gave me great strength, and this strength was passed on to my mom and the rest of the family. I asked the other members of my family to refrain from showing any sign of sorrow in front of my mom, I even threatened them if anything happens to my mom I will always hold them responsible for it. It was the hardest three month’s period that we all went through, one operation after another. Not to mention the times we spent waiting for each lab result that sometimes took more than ten days. I kept reassuring my mom that breast cancer is easily dealt with nowadays and there is nothing to worry about, although the cancer had spread under her arm and I wasn’t sure of what I was saying. But with meditation and positive thinking; as not allowing sorrow to overtake me, and kept telling myself I will have enough sorrow to deal with later, for now I only want to see the bright side, and I am sure it’s not too late. Repeating the reassurances to myself made me very strong that my own dad was amazed by my attitude. And thanx god we did pass through that stage and my mom is ok now.
    For those who don’t know me personally; I am a very week and sensitive person. I can’t even watch a sad movie. How did I get all that strength?
    Peach; I’m assuming that you already know how to meditate. If you have any doubts. I will gladly dedicate a post for that, coz this process needs a lot of elaboration.


  11. AyyA
    Nov 26, 2004 @ 12:30:00

    Hey guys vote for the Don before the end of Nov., he needs our support


  12. Peach
    Nov 27, 2004 @ 01:22:00

    7amdilla 3ala salamat ur mom 🙂 thats real powerfull stuff ur talking about..
    but that’s not what i was asking. I was asking how while ur meditating u can take a step back and look at ur self from another perspective .. like ur looking at a stranger .. that’s what i’ve been trying to do .. i’m either not consintrating or i’m doing something wrong! I dunno ..


  13. AyyA
    Nov 27, 2004 @ 01:49:00

    Ok Peach then I will soon dedicate a post for meditation, and this would be clear to you.


  14. Drunk'n'Gorgeous
    Nov 27, 2004 @ 10:53:00

    I’m truly sorry about what happened to your mom and what all of you (including her) had to go through at the time. 7imidillah ina your mom is okay now 🙂

    Rabab, I’ve read somewhere that there are monks who stick other monks into a tiny space in walls, hollowed out trees, or just wholes in the ground. This is supposed to be “enlightenment” or an act of serving God…not too sure. Anyways the monks that are chosen have to obey. They’re stuck in a small space (let’s say a whole in the wall) and they’re fed only enough to keep them alive. Their muscles slowly disentigrate and they lose weight ’till they almost dissappear. The thing is, I’m not sure where I read this and I’m not sure about the whole process. I’m just curious, is this the same thing that you’re talking about? Rebirth in a sense? Also have you heard of any of what I just talked about? If so, please let me know. Either way, thanks 🙂


  15. AyyA
    Nov 27, 2004 @ 13:39:00

    I’m not sure about what you have read, but I have seen a TV documentary, sometimes back, about something similar to what you are talking about. And it’s called eternal enlightenment. It was initially a ritual in the Bon religion, and then got adapted in Buddhism. This process was strictly practiced by the monks who were the gurus. As you know that Buddhists believe in multiple rebirths of mortals; this process was practiced to gain immortality. The monk would decide totally on his own and after consulting with other religious figures to go through this. And the food that is passed to him daily is basically some herbs to preserve his body after he dies. Amazingly one of the monks (forgot his name) was preserved in a very good condition since thousands of years back and they still have the mummy in one of the temples in the Tibet. This mummy has a mysterious smile with signs of deep passion on his facial expressions, and they believe that this is the sign that he has finally seen the truth before his death. He is considered sacred and believers visit him and make a wish, provided it’s a good wish on others and their wish would come true.
    Btw, this practice is banned in the Tibet lately, and considered against the law.
    What I mentioned in the subject above is a rebirth process, it is practiced with any one who wants to be enlightened and is practiced under the monk’s supervision and only for about six days.


  16. AyyA
    Nov 27, 2004 @ 13:40:00

    oh and 7abeeti thanx for your concern ’bout mom


  17. Sky Walker
    Nov 28, 2004 @ 02:16:00

    Dearest Rabab
    I have to admit that I’m not a great believer in Buddhism or any of the Far Eastern religions, theologies… as well as my ignorance. However, I do believe in the human strength, the power of the spirit, as I see it on daily basis. I have to say that I am an optimist by nature, and always like to put the positive thought before the negative. I know that is the impression you may have when you read my comments. The explanation, at least to me is simple, I simply had a bad year, and this has given me a bleak prospective. I thank God everyday for whatever blessings I have, even in these dark and dire times. As much I think Oprah’s show being too commercial, and sometimes, having a tad of theatrical emotions for my taste, I still remember very distinctly something said on one of her shows, COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS EVERYDAY. I also am grateful for the love and support of my family and friends, to me that is the source of my willing to continue and the belief that things will get better. I thank you deeply for sharing your experience during your mother’s illness, as painful as I can imagine that experience has been for you, or still is. I am hoping, in fact waiting, for my bleak weather to clear up, to put me back on track. Finally I would like to say that I am, as stated in my profile, very bad in handling depression.

    Thank You for that enlightening blog


  18. Jelly Belly
    Nov 28, 2004 @ 16:20:00

    Dear Rabab, Thanks for your inspirational stories o 7emdallah 3ala salamat alwalda, I can’t even imagine the sadness you went through. You read my comments on mosan mosan blog on depression. It’s very hard thing to think positive and not worry. My main problem these days is being away from my family for such a long time and the fear of disappointing them. I have been in the U.S for quite a while now and still working on my degree. I have to admit I made a lot of wrong choices and mistakes bas we learn, I believe in the saying “kil e6rag eb ta3lom” o yama en6ageet e6ragat. Anyways, what I wanted to say is I need to learn how to fight harder to keep on smiling and believing in myself. I have changed a lot of things in my life in order to do so…I started to discover my inner strengths that I thought I never had! I even began slowly accepting the way I look and learning to love every curve in my body, I have to say it is a very slow process because every time I feel good some asshole would say some negative comment just brings me 10 steps back again. I wish I could filter all the negativity that surrounds me some times. Bas I think I’m taking baby steps to have some sort of inner peace.
    Oh yeah Rabab I would like to read or know more about meditation, I have been trying to meditate from time to time and I would love to learn more.
    Please visit me in my blog, I would love to hear your comments.


  19. AyyA
    Nov 28, 2004 @ 16:31:00

    Dear Sky Walker
    I’m not a believer in Buddhism as a religion as well. But the Far East never ceases to amaze me with its history, heritage, wisdom, as well as its consistency and the know how of using mind power.
    Body energy concept for one is an ancient science in the Far East, but recently been introduced to the West. In my opinion this energy was so powerful that those people who practiced it and felt the supernatural effects, connected it to religion, while in reality, it was just “mind power” that all human possess but didn’t realize they did.
    Let’s go back to your comment:
    Thanx for the encouragement buddy as well as for your concern about mom, and I liked the tone in your comment; very positive, but let’s analyze your last sentence:
    “I would like to say that I am, as stated in my profile, very bad in handling depression”
    Let’s define depression as per Longman’s Advanced American dictionary: a FEELING of sadness in which you feel there is no hope for the future.
    My definition of this feeling: an internal factor that is an affect of some external or internal cause (CAUSE AND AFFECT)
    The probability of this CAUSE being an internal is very limited, so I’m assuming the CAUSE is external; which means, it’s out of our control.
    Let’s go back to the AFFECT; it is an internal factor, therefore, the control may be hard but is possible, and that’s why you chose to say” I’m bad in handling depression” and did not say” I can’t handle depression”.
    Now I don’t mean to give you a psycho lecture here, all I want is to help you chose a different perspective in challenging your depression using you mind power (the turtle); on a piece of paper write down all actions you can take to fight your enemy (depression), baring in mind that no one and nothing is more important to you than you. And remember what DJ mentioned in her comment above” Positive thinking may not make our problems go away but it most certainly can make them more manageable”, good luck buddy and hope to see your profile caption change one day to a bright one.


  20. AyyA
    Nov 28, 2004 @ 19:09:00

    Oh Jelly Belly, you reminded me of the good ol days; when I left to the States at a very young age, I was so insecure that I got married to the first guy who appriciated me( well at least I thought he did :)), talking about wrong choices ha, ma 3alaina
    7abeebti I don’t believe in making wrong choices as per say, but I believe in fate. Wrong choices don’t look wrong when we made them; therefore, there were reasons behind making them in the first place. These reasons may not be palpable at some point, but soon enough we come to realize them, and accept them.
    I’m glad to see you changed your attitude toward yourself, and mind you those people who try to put you down are sick themselves and you should feel sorry for them and not let them get into you. Stay away from them as much as you can, you don’t need negative vibrations. Get closer to people who love you and appreciate you or at least don’t cause you pain. And sure I will pay you a visit ASAP and very happy to have you as a friend.


  21. Peach
    Nov 28, 2004 @ 23:10:00

    Goodie 🙂 I iz patiantly (im) waiting 🙂


  22. mario
    Aug 03, 2006 @ 11:53:00

    What are your 50,000 thoughts a day creating?

    Our thoughts create our reality. This is a simple truth known by all people involved on the spiritual path. It is one of the most taught universal principles in the personal development field. Yet it is one of the most misunderstood!

    People practice visualisation, affirmations, they use hypnosis, subliminal programming or countless other tools to transform their lives. However they fail to recognise one key area in their lives that hinder these wonderful techniques from being effective.

    They sit day after day visualising their perfect scene and yet nothing happens. Why? They have followed all the instructions to the letter! They have chanted and imagined! They have formed a colourful, vibrant scene in their minds and affirmed that this is their reality. Then all of a sudden things get worse! What is going on?

    Would you like to know the secret? Would you like to know why these people get no results? Would you like to hear one powerful statement that explains everything?

    Good. I will tell you why these people get no results or even opposite results to those they are aiming for -simply because of the following truth. Consciously controlled thoughts such as visualisations do not materialise – ALL thoughts materialise!!!
    Most people believe that if they visualise for 10 minutes a day their lives will magically transform. This is not the case. You must change your core thinking. You think approx. 50,000 thoughts a day. How many of those thoughts are working against your ten minute visualisation?
    You can control the thoughts that enter your mind by changing the way you view the world. You can decide which thoughts you give energy to and which thoughts you discard.

    The thoughts that you follow and give energy to become more dominant than the thoughts you discard. Your subconscious mind records these as your dominant picture on the issue at hand. You then move towards this picture because your subconscious mind starts making your outside world reflect the picture that you have stored internally.
    Your mind should be on whatever you want. The picture you need to have is a positive vision of you already having achieved your goal. To realise this vision you need to focus and concentrate. Remember thoughts are real, they create your reality.
    Let’s say you have been visualising a new house. You spend your ten minutes in meditation picturing yourself living in your dream home. You finish your session and get up feeling positive that you will achieve your goal. Then during the day you get a heating bill through the post and exclaim “Oh no look how expensive this is I cannot afford to heat this house”. Where is your focus in the present moment? What are you affirming? You are telling your subconscious mind that you cannot deal with what you have. You are affirming that your life is not how you want it to be. If you knew without doubt that within a week you would be moving to your new home would you honestly be worried about a heating bill? Perhaps other doubts creep in like “I should be happy with what I have”, or “I will never get this house looking the way I want it” and so on and so on.
    These thoughts that are not aligned with your goal. You are not giving complete attention to what you want. Whilst you are dealing with these other lines of thought your attention is not on your goal.
    If you are aware of your thoughts you will suddenly realise that you have spent much more energy on counter productive thoughts than on creating a dominant picture of the goal you want.
    Point your focus in the direction of you’re the life you want. Think about what you want NOT what you don’t want. It’s that simple.

    Your focus determines your reality. Change your focus and you change your life. personal development


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